Black Friday is here, but these deals won’t last long! Shop Medik8 and save 30% off your must-have products*

Shop Now

_{^{*Terms & Conditions Apply}}

Vera Mindy Chokalingam was born in Cambridge, MA to Indian immigrants so she had no choice but to be outstanding. The writer, producer, actress, comedian, 40 time award nominee (including six Emmy nominations) and 17 time award winner (including a Tony award) who graduated from Dartmouth and has a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame started out writing plays in her mother’s OBGYN practice when she was six years old.

In interviews she talks about her experience being the only woman and person of color on the writing staff of The Office. Her drive to prove herself resulted in her writing the most shows (24) in addition to acting. She has produced The Mindy Project, Never Have I Ever, The Sex Lives of College Girls, Running Point, and more.

Kaling knows her value. She declined to reprise her role voicing the character Disgust in the animated film Inside Out 2 when she was offered just $100,000 for the role (as was co-star Bill Hader, the voice of Fear). This was compared to Amy Poehler, who voiced Joy, being paid nearly $5 million, according to reports.

Never married, Kaling is mother to three children. About marriage she says, "My work is so rewarding and I'm so self-centered about it that I'm kind of excited about not having to go home and ask someone about their day."

We couldn’t agree more. Watch her interview then check out this fun video of the time when she taught former Vice President Kamala Harris how to make dosas.

Sandra Bullock stars in one of my favorite movies of all time. The Net. The movie is intended as a cautionary tale about the potential for the internet to steal your identity and ruin your life. I learned something very different.

There’s a scene toward the beginning of the movie when Angela Bennett, our main character, sits at her computer contentedly doing her job. She pauses for a moment to access a website and order a pizza without talking to anyone. Sure enough, 30 minutes later, the pizza delivery guy shows up. My mind was blown.

In 1995, when the movie came out, getting a pizza (for me) meant driving to the bank to get cash then driving to the pizza place to order and pick up the pie. Paying for food with a credit card just didn’t happen in my world. I had never considered it. Until The Net.

When I finished the movie I thought, yeah, sure, I could have my identity stolen but the incredible important thing was that I could, possibly, find a job and get food without leaving my house!

Not leaving my house has always been a passion of mine. My most cherished childhood memories include Sunday mornings at home curled up in a sunny corner with a novel and my little dog nestled beside me.

Aside from my deep sorrow for the tragic numbers of people who died during the pandemic, being quarantined was a cosmic dream come true.

My dog count was up to four by that time so I wasn’t exactly alone; having some kind of living being around does matter. But my main snuggle buddies were me, myself, and I.

I enjoyed making myself elaborate breakfasts in bed served on a cloth-covered tray with hotel style cutlery and serving dishes, soaking in my claw footed tub with Netflix, soapy bubbles, and a glass of sparkling cider, and nestling into my armchair to tend to my crocheting and watch nothing happen outside my window.

When last did you give yourself such a gift?

In a future issue we’ll talk about falling in love with yourself (subscribe!) but for now, here’s an article with suggestions for how to make your time alone luxurious.

Live an elevated life on a single income. Explore strategies for beating the system.

An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure and in few contexts is this truer than with home maintenance. This article lists simple hacks (and links to the useful resources to make them happen) that can add life, equity, and enjoyment to your nest. Check it out.

Grab some popcorn, get lost in a true-life story, then get together and yak about it.

Each month we’ll post a documentary that is available on YouTube. On the final Sunday of the month we’ll hold a gab fest to spill the tea and run our mouths about what we saw.

The gab fest is especially for paid subscribers. Join our paid community to participate.

In this month’s documentary, presented by the YouTube channel Only Human, neurodiverse main characters Ben and Ellie go on heroic quests to find a job. Only, why should the quest be heroic?

Watch the documentary (posted below) then prep your personal charcuterie board and join our virtual gathering. It’s like book club but for documentaries.

We will start the conversation with three prompts:

Paid subscribers will receive a Zoom link on the day before our party

Banishment is the most ancient form of punishment the human species practices. In fact, Christianity’s foundation stories are about banishment. Satan gets uppity and gets kicked out of heaven, Adam and Eve disobey God, God kicks them out of Eden; Adam and Eve’s eldest son, Cain, slays Abel, his younger brother, and his punishment is to wander the earth.

Banishment is still our primary form of punishment. We kick people we label criminals the out of society and ensure they stay gone by confining them to prison.

Banishment works because, as herd animals, human beings need connection, not just for physical safety, but to thrive. Even introverts need to reach out and touch someone every so often (IYKYK).

Combine this with the human desire for stasis and predictability and you have a recipe that can explain why you feel you can’t leave a lackluster marriage that is sucking your soul dry.

Your instinctive preference for belonging, connection, predictability, and stability is baked into your human conditioning.

Facing your fear that divorce will leave you alone and vulnerable to the treacherous unknown can actually feel like choosing death.

In measured doses, fear is a useful adaptation. Being alert to potential and actual threats helps you to stay safe and alive. The trick is finding balance between useful fear and fear that keeps you frozen in place when you really want to fly.

Check out the video below for the inspiration to fuel your courage to center your well being, take the leap, and liberate yourself.

You are both your most powerful adversary and your most powerful ally. You can choose to focus on being your own best friend.